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FROM THE AUTHOR Inspired by Meg Thee Stallion song lyric "Imma make him eat me out while I'm watching anime." Reader will be female with Afro-American features Fatgum will have a dad bod cause big guys are sexy too This is also my first fanfic so sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes. Hope it's a nice balance of fluffy fluff and smutty goodness. Chapter 1 After working 10 hour shifts all week you finally get to have some time off to relax. You decide to spend that time turning your brain off by unwinding with your comfort anime, Ghost Stories. It's funny and it doesn't require any deep thinking to understand the plot. You're sitting on the couch snacking on some fruit and chocolate dip, wearing nothing but your husband's shirt. It was hanging off your shoulders exposing a nice amount of your brown breast. You knew he wouldn't mind. You've been married for five years and was dating for three years. You knew that he was a sucker for seeing you in his clothes. Plus it felt so comfortable wearing only a loose shirt and underwear. "RUN! SHE'S A GHOST AND A BITCH!"echoed throughout the living room. You were laughing your butt off as you were watching one of your favorite episodes. The sound of the front door opening was deaf to your ears as Taishiro, aka Fatgum walked into your home. He managed to leave work early today to spend more time with his beautiful wife. Taishiro was about to announce himself until he saw you on the couch. His tall stature made it easy for him to see every part of you. The way his yellow shirt popped against the color of your dark amber skin. How the loose fitting showed the giggle of your breast every time you laughed. The sunlight revealing the shine of your tight obsidian curls. "God she's so beautiful.", he thought to himself. You began to feel like someone was watching you. Sure enough when you turned your head you saw your husband standing there with a gentle smile on his face. Your brown eyes widen with excitement since you weren't expecting him to be home so soon. "Hey big handsome!", you shouted as you jumped off the couch to hug him. You landed into his arms as he caught you, his big belly cushioning your fall. "Hello to you too honey bear," he said cheerfully as he squeezed you tight. You were showering his face with loving pecks before you finally began to kiss his lips. The feeling of your thick pillowy lips against Tai's felt like heaven. Once you've both separated you said, "I thought you weren't coming home til dinner time babe." "Like I wasn't gonna try to spend as much time with my darling wife as possible," your husband replied. You chuckled as you climbed down from his massive body. "Well I'm watching Ghost Stories if you wanna join me," you said getting back to the couch patting the seat next to you. "Come on over here Fat Daddy," you say with a flirty voice.Taishiro snickered at your antics. As soon as he sat down you snuggled into your marshmallow of a man. His large tummy made him perfect for cuddling. Most women only see the BMI hero attractive when he's in his fitgum form. You also admit seeing your man with six pack abs is sexy. But you also know that whenever he turns into fitgum, it's only because of a last resort effort to stop a villian in a deadly situation. You'd rather not have your husband be on the verge of death all the time just to see more defined muscles. Plus Taishiro was always fat around you when you first started dating. You weren't even aware of his slender form until a few months into the relationship. He showed up late once for a date and when he finally arrived you thought he was a confused stranger. It took awhile but he managed to convince you that he was the real Fatgum and explained to you how his quirk works. It was never his size that made you want to be with him. It was his confidence and kind heart that made you fall madly in love with this gentle giant. Snapping yourself out of your thoughts you notice that another favorite episode of Ghost Stories was starting, the bunny episode. "C'mon jump. I SAID JUMP!" You and Taishiro both laugh at one of the shows' classic lines. Snuggling up closer to him you place your hand on his thick thigh while he puts his hand on your hip. His hand is so large however his fingers are able to grab onto your buttcheek. He gives your butt a firm squeeze and a smack. "Tai!", you cackled with a big smile on your face. Your husband looks at you "What?", he asked, "It's been a while. Besides you know how get when I see you wearing my stuff." Well there was no denying that statement. "He's too young to be having wet dreams!" The both of you snort as the show interrupted the conversation. "How is it my fault that your clothes are so comfy?", you ask in a teasing manner. You then lay yourself across his lap and stretch to prove your point. Taishiro can see your nippels harden from the friction of his shirt rubbing against your boobs. He also notices the slight peek of your panties showing from the bottom. He traces his hand up your velvety brown thighs and begins to rub his fingers against your clothed sex. "And how is it my fault that you look so good when you wear em?", he asks in a deep sensual tone. You sigh pleasantly as you feel his grand fingers rubbing your slit through your underwear. "What was that darlin'? I didn't hear you that well," your husband said with a smirk and a seductive look in his golden eyes. But you weren't about to give him the satisfaction of surrendering just yet. You lept off of him and moved to the other end of the couch. "I'm trying to, to, to watch my show," you said slightly embarrassed by your stammer. You picked up your forgotten fruit and chocolate sauce and stuffed your face in an attempt to get your brain back on track. Taishiro chuckled and leaned back on the couch. The anime abandoned from his mind, he watched you eat from his peripheral vision. He knew you were aroused; you were just being too bratty to admit it. While he was observing you licking the chocolate dip off your fingers, he started to feel a new hunger swell up inside him. The hefty man sunk down to the floor and crawled in-between your legs. You were aware of what he was trying to do and tried to act indifferent towards his actions. "That's right sweetheart. Just focus on your show while you can," he thought to himself. He then grabbed your panties and began to slide them down until his shirt was the only thing you were wearing. Seeing his wife's shimmering pussy made his mouth water. Even with your legs spread and resting on your husband's shoulders, you still tried to focus on the TV screen. Then you felt something firm and wet sweep up and down your core. You let out a deep breath. Feeling Tai's tongue squirm against your folds made you start to melt. Yet you still refused to give yourself up. The urge to be a brat was still strong within you. And Taishiro was ready to take on your challenge. The BMI hero looked up at your face while he was still devouring your center. Your lips parted and a slight dazed look in your deep brown eyes. He saw your chest rapidly rise and fall as you tried to hold back your moans. He was winning this battle of wills. Taishiro decided to up the ante and began to circle his tongue against your nub, and sink his middle finger into your wet canal. You couldn't hold back anymore and an unrestrained wail escaped your vocal cords. Taishiro stopped and gave you a flirtatious grin. "Gotcha" was all he said and he continued to feast upon your honeypot. In and out the BMI hero's finger thrusted inside your entrance; his tongue constantly flicking against your clit. The feeling was so amazing that you couldn't help but let out brazen cries of pleasure, "Oh fuck Tai baby don't stop!" Your husband was getting drunk off of your sweet flavor. Watching your hips jerk every time he moved made Taishiro want to see you completely lose your mind to him. He inserted another digit into your sheath and began to massage your most tender spot from within. Louder and louder your moans became. Unable to hold on much longer, you grabbed Taishiro's hair and grinded against his face possessivly. Your husband welcomed the rough treatment and sped up his movements even faster and harder. Seeing his wife turn into a lustful feind was such a turn on for him. "FUCK YES TAI I'M GONNA CUM! TAISHIRO! TAISHIROOOOO!" You screamed your husband's name over and over as if you were praying to a god. An amazing, sexy plump beast of a god. A powerful shriek left your lips one last time. Your inner folds clench your husband's fingers as a wave of euphoria and wetness comes out of your body. Taishiro drank up your fluids blissfully. The heavenly taste of your sweet nectar was enough make him feel weightless. After cleaning the shining dew off his face, he rose up to stare at his breath-taking wife. Your thick curls were tousled, eyes staring at the ceiling unfocused, and body shuddering from the aftermath of his meal. Taishiro couldn't be more proud of his pussy eating skills. He directed your face towards him and kissed you tenderly on the lips. You deepened the kiss unbothered by the taste of yourself on his tongue. When both of you parted you stared into each other's eyes and smiled. All of a sudden the tender loving moment was interrupted. "Not because you're a rabbit, but because you're black!" You couldn't help but burst into laughter when you remembered what you were doing before things got hot and steamy. Taishiro was hollering as well. He turned off the TV and picked you up to carry you to your bedroom. You knew what was to come next. You caught a glimpse of your husband's sizable bluge ready to be tended to. He looked at you and said, "Imma let you rest up first darlin. But you still might wanna call off work tomorrow." You didn't need to be told twice. You kissed Taishiro's cheek and said, "I love you big stud." He smiled, "I love you too honey biscuit." You can watch your anime later. If you want to read more from this author. Click Below 👇 👇 👇 https://archiveofourown.org/works/31322456?view_adult=true Animeforwomen does not own this fanfic or fan art cover.

Spend your Friday catching up with webtoon "The Secret Ninja Association"(The SNA for short). Author: Alisha Smith. Synopsis: "The SNA is the most elite college in the world. Only the strongest, wealthiest, ninjas are able to enroll here. With a college this elite, who knew that ninjas could have so much drama?! Follow our cast as they face everyday struggles such as betrayal, heartbreak, past mistakes, toxic family, and every struggle that college life has to throw at them. They soon learn that pain inflicted on the inside is far worse than any wound they could obtain on the outside!" Read it here: The SNA webtoon This original webtoon is made by Alisha Smith, an artist who used her dreams to create her story...literally! She answered a few questions where she tells us more about The SNA. Smith also gives us answers that can help anyone who wants to create a manga or webtoon. Check it out below! Animeforwomen: How long have you been drawing? Alisha Smith: "I've been drawing since I was 11, but I didn't start digital art until 2021. I'm still learning, and slowly getting better at it everyday!" 💜 AFW: We noticed that you made a webtoon fairly recently. What is the name of the webtoon? Can you tell us a synopsis of it? Smith: "My webtoon is called the SNA (which is short for The Secret Ninja Association). This story is a romance/Drama revolving around a girl who has suffered abuse most of her life, and is now sent to a college-like setting where she will get to live her dreams of having friends & finding love. She soon finds out the harsh reality that comes with having friends, and that heartbreak & betrayal cuts deeper than any blade ever could." 💜 AFW: What inspired you to create your webtoon? Smith: "When I was 14 I had a dream that I was Arisho (the MC of the story), and I met all of the characters in my story at the SNA. It was so weird because I would have this dream every night, and seemed like each day it was a continuation of that dream. So I started to write it down, and fill in the details I couldn't remember. I have been writing this story ever since and I'm 25 now lol a few months ago I decided I wanted to share it with the world, and I thought the best way to do that was with a comic since i love to draw. So I started a webtoon!" 💜 AFW: Are there any obstacles you had to face? How did you overcome them? Smith: "Drawing wach panel takes FOREVER, especially if you have a job and other responsibilities. I really struggle with balancing my webtoon and real life, but I have a schedule and dedicate a minimum of 3 hours every day to drawing it." 💜 AFW: What are your goals for your webtoon or as an artist in general? Smith: "My end goal is to have my webtoon animated, and to become a best seller. I also want the title of "longest running webtoon ever"! My end goal as an artist is to have my own production studio where I can help small artists get their ideas published and animated!" 💜 AFW: Any advice for other women who want to start a webtoon or manga? Smith: "My advice is to JUST DO IT! Don't wait until your art is better, or wait until you finish writing your story. The more time you waste is time taken away from building a fan base. Surprisingly people love to see the growth in your work. Also don't compare your comic's success to other comics. They have spent years building their fanbase to get millions of views and you are just starting. It takes time and consistency is key. Remember, if you don't believe in yourself then no one will." 💜 (Alisha Smith, author of "The SNA" webtoon) Follow Alisha For More! Facebook TikTok ( No copyright interferential intended) All rights reserved to the respective owner.

@leslovedraws is a digital artist who creates beautiful JoJo's Bizarre fan art pieces! "I started to draw when I was 10 ✨ I was inspired by other digital artist of other fandoms 🌈 My favorite drawing is this (picture below) because I realized with every little detail that they're my favorite characters from Jojo's 🥰✨" Check out her drawing of Jotaro and Kakyoin Follow Her Tiktok Instagram Facebook Twitter ( No copyright interferential intended) All rights reserved to the respective owner.

Alexis Hopkins recently started a Facebook group for all anime figure/statue enthusiasts! In the group you can find photos of anime merch, information on where to find new pre-orders, and more! If you wish to join click here Check This Out! 👇👇 We asked Alexis a few questions about her group including what inspired her to create it.💜 💜What is your group called? "Anime Figure/Statue Resource" 💜When and what made you start your group? A: "This group is brand new, we just started it recently. I felt the desire to create it after experiencing the frustration of wanting one spot to hear about all the recent releases from figure manufacturers, finding trustworthy sites to buy from and learning about planned figures for the future. As wonderful as social media is, sometimes the information we are looking for can get lost in a sea of information we aren’t." 💜Who is it for? A: "I think this group is great for people who are new to anime figure collecting, and possibly even those who have been collecting for decades. Whether you only want/have 1 or 2 figures, or if your basement is wall to wall shelves full of dioramas, this group (hopefully) can benefit you." 💜What is your main goal for your group? A: "To give people the information they want/need to begin buying figure collection, or even just add to their current collections. I want people to be safe and to have a group where they can ask questions about a sellers trustworthiness, and also find out about figure brands they may have never heard of. I would love for the community to grow and become a resource that collectors can come to rely on. The first step to accomplishing the goal is for the group to grow, and I’m grateful for the opportunity to talk about the group to begin that first step." 💜What is your favorite anime figure you collected so far if any? A: "Ohhh, this is such a hard question especially when I’m still really excited about a recent preorder I made. I think if I had to choose just one of my figures to call my favorite, it would be my Ancient Magus Bride figure set by Genei. The Ancient Magus Bride (魔法使いの嫁/Mahō Tsukai no Yome) is one of my all time favorite Animes/Manga, but I discovered it after it’s first season was already completed. When I discovered this figure it was no longer in production and became my dream figure, the one I felt I had no hope of ever owning. Without my knowing my sweet husband proceeded to watch eBay like a hawk for months, waiting for one in a price point we could afford. A seller in japan happen to post one at a reasonable price considering the rarity, and my husband scooped it up after verifying its authenticity. He could barely contain his excitement and immediately told me once he got home what he had bought for me. That set not only is my dream come true, but also holds such a special memory now of my husband going above and beyond for me to have something he knew I was dying to have in my collection." ( Alexis' favorite figure :Ancient Magus Bride (魔法使いの嫁/Mahō Tsukai no Yome) Animeforwomen does not own Anime Figure/Statue Resource nor the pictures used in the feature

@hailthenaninator is a cosplayer and photographer. Check out her answers to our questions & Follow Her Tiktok Instagram Facebook Twitter 💜What made you get into cosplaying? @H: I've always been a crafty person and into anime. Growing up, I didn't think people in America had the same interests until I attended my first con. Seeing cosplayers opened a whole new door to me that I never knew existed. 💜What is your favorite cosplay? @H: My all time favorite is my Empress Wu. It always makes me feel so confident. 💜We see that you do photography as well. Do you enjoy being in front of the camera more or behind the camera? @H: I'd say both equally!! I've worked with a lot of wonderful photographers who has made my cosplaying experience very enjoyable. I do a lot more behind the camera these days because it's less taxing on my body than being in elaborate cosplays haha. Both are very rewarding when I get to create magic with and for others. 💜Just for fun: What is your favorite anime? @H: This one is hard! I adore Code Geass and Sakura Cardcaptor as classics! With more modern animes, I like Kino'. Animeforwomen does not own photo

We asked @missxtreme_kita90 💜 What inspired you to start cosplaying? 💜What’s your favorite cosplay you have ever done? Before you read her answers check out her Muichiro Tokito cosplay from Demon Slayer Her answers 💜"The inspiration behind me cosplaying mostly was because of my son. He always loved seeing me dress up as any character." 💜" My favorite cosplay that I have done. Most people would say Shego was my best one but I think my Muichiro Tokito cosplay (from Demon Slayer) was my best one, because you don't get to see a lot of characters from anime get cosplayed so I took a chance at it." Follow her for more content! IG: @missxtreme_kita90 Twitter: @MissXtreme_Kita Animeforwomen does not own these photos

We are so excited to announce our very first FAN ART CONTEST!!! FOR THE WINNER A feature with your fan art on our website with…Dabi signed Funco Pop & Merch THE RULES 💜Submit One Fan Art Drawing by August 28th 12pmEST 💜It Can Be of Any Anime Character! 💜Send Submission to Animeforwomen@gmail.com

We asked @renegoncosplay 💜 What inspired you to start cosplaying? 💜What’s your favorite cosplay you have ever done? Before you read her answers check out her Misa Amane cosplay from Death Note Her Answers “I used to cosplay at conventions regularly but one year I decided to make my own costume and I’ve been in love with it ever since! It’s a really great creative outlet for me. I don’t know if I have an absolute favorite but my Misa Cosplay is up there!” Follow her for more content! Instagram Twitter TikTok Animeforwomen does not own these photos

@D.J.Morrow_Senpai aka DeJa did a Sesshomaru make-up tutorial just for us! Enjoy her tutorial and comment any questions you may have! Follow DeJa for more cosplay content Instagram

We asked @bernadettemira.hagen 💜 What inspired you to start cosplaying? 💜What’s your favorite cosplay you have ever done? Before you read her answers check out her Sophie Hatter cosplay from Howls Moving Castle. Her answers: " I actually started cosplaying because I was going through some heavy depression. And as a Black woman, I wanted to knock down the barriers of “You can’t be this character cause they’re white…” And I’m so happy that I did because it has made my life so much richer to express myself this way. My favorite cosplay is definitely Sophie from Howls Moving Castle." Follow her for more content! Instagram , Twitter *Animeforwomen does not own these pictures*

We asked @@saratoninn.x 💜 What inspired you to start cosplaying? 💜What’s your favorite cosplay you have ever done? Before you read her answers check out her Power cosplay from Chainsaw Man manga (the anime is set to arrive this year) Her answers: "My aunt got me into anime and took me to my first convention when I was 8 and I was completely mesmerized by all the wonderful cosplays!!! Recently I’d have to say my favorite cosplay is my Power from Chainsaw Man! I love it because it makes me feel like a total badass!!!" Follow her for more content! Instagram *Animeforwomen does not own these pictures*

(artwork done by SaiPaintsaStory) Chapter 1 I've Been Holding On/To the Shapes Within My Mind "Good luck, Iwa-chan." "Yeah, good luck, Tooru." He replied. We both just stood there, not wanting to be the first to turn away. The wind was chilly and fierce that day, as if it knew my world would be in perpetual winter from that point on. We both knew that this was it. We were headed to different universities, different paths in life. We'd made the promise to stay in touch, but no one ever does and everyone knows it when they say the words. I hated myself so much in that instant for not having had the balls to tell him how I felt, how I've always felt. Eventually, he kicked at a rock he was staring at on the ground, turned and walked away. I watched him disappear into the crowd of other graduates, head down. The wind whipped around me, chilling me to the bone, the warmth of his presence now gone. I'd think about this day for years to come and want to call him every time. I'd even pull out my phone, pull up his name, but I could just never make myself hit call. I was sure he was happy with some girl somewhere, maybe even married. I'd had so many opportunities to tell him the truth, but my damn pride stopped me every single time. We'd been friends for as long as I could remember, but it was somewhere around our first year in high school that I'd fallen in love with him. I'd only realized how I felt after I'd finally realized I was gay. I resisted the thought so hard at first, thinking that I was just a horny kid and my hormones were searching for something to latch on to. I didn't want to feel that way for my best friend, but no matter what I did or how I tried to deny it to myself, the truth was the truth. I remember the first time I saw him with those eyes. He was sleeping over, like he did all the time. I woke up in the middle of the night because I was thirsty and got up to go get a glass of water. I saw him sleeping on the futon next to my bed and tried to step over him so as not to wake him. It was warm and he'd kicked off the blanket. It was as if some god wanted me to notice how perfect he looked softly snoring in the moonlight coming through the window. All he was wearing was a pair of shorts, his hand laying lightly on his, even then, perfect abs. My whole throat went dry and I felt my dick spring to life in my boxers. He was so indescribably beautiful and I wanted nothing more than to touch him and to feel him touch me. I just stood there for what I thought was forever, staring at him sleeping. I couldn't will myself to move an inch. The rhythmic sound of his breathing hypnotizing me like a Siren's song. I ached so hard just looking at him, and I couldn't correlate what I was feeling with what my brain knew of Iwa. He suddenly rolled over onto his side and I jumped and ran to the bathroom. What the fuck was I thinking? How am I hard from just LOOKING at Iwa? I leaned against the bathroom door, trying to figure out if I was having some sort of lucid dream and this was all just make-believe. Maybe it was just because I just woke up? Yeah, maybe it had nothing at all to do with Iwa. Just male biology. I pushed off the wall, walking over to the sink. I turned on the faucet, taking a drink directly from the source and then splashing my face with the chilly water. I'd hoped it would calm me down some, but it didn't even phase the throb in my shorts. I stood there, leaning over the sink, trying to think of anything else. Old ladies, sad puppies, losing a game, nothing was making it go away. Fuck it. It's what teenage boys do, right? Not like I hadn't done it before. It just never really worked for me. I gave in and pulled myself out of my boxers. I tried thinking of hot girls, hot girls on me, hot girls on girls, trying to avoid the visual of him laying there that kept popping into my head. I imagined his hand replacing mine and the sensation that came over me was like nothing I'd ever experienced. It didn't take long after that for me to finish with a fiery ending, the likes of which I'd only seen exaggerated in porn. As I cleaned up, I felt utterly horrible for using Iwa that way, even though he knew nothing about it. He'd never speak to me again if he knew what I just thought about him doing. It had to be a fluke, right? He's my best friend. Nothing more than a fluke. I resigned myself to that thought and tiptoed back to bed. I tried not to look as I stepped over him to get into my bed, but I couldn't take my eyes away from him. Stupid moonlight. Making him look that way. I thought about closing the curtain, but it was too hot to cut off the breeze that way. I forced myself to turn away from him and shoved a pillow over my head so I couldn't see that stupid moonlight. I was sweating to death under it, but at least I couldn't see him anymore. At some point I fell back asleep and life went on. I pushed everything I'd thought and felt that night as far away as I could, but it would needle at me every so often. I'd catch myself staring at his hands, especially if he was lifting his shirt or something. I started avoiding him when we changed for volleyball, either changing earlier or using a stall in the bathroom instead of the locker room. It would be fine, eventually right? I'd stop thinking about it eventually, right? I didn't want to feel like I had to avoid my best friend forever because I was some kind of overly horny idiot. I thought about just letting us drift apart, but the thought of him not being in my life hurt more in my heart than the thought of him finding out I was a pervert. In the days and weeks after that, I "tested" myself over and over to see if it was just a one-time thing and I was thinking about needless things. Turned out girls really did nothing for me. Not even a twitch. I tried, I really tried to like them, but I might as well have been trying to get turned on by a coffee table. I searched up some guys on the internet and they definitely did things for me. I remember thinking that god was a cruel being to make me love playing volleyball while making me attracted to men as well. I didn't go to school for two days after realizing that I was, in fact, gay. I couldn't face Iwa or any of my other teammates, thinking I'd be turned on by them at any time. I mean, what if I suddenly get a raging hard on in the middle of a game just because I'm staring at someone's butt? I mean, was I just going to get excited at any guy? I was terrified by the whole thing. I only went back because my sister threatened to kick my ass if I didn't. I remember trying to avoid any contact with my friends that day, worried that they could tell or something. Like overnight I had the word GAY tattooed on my forehead or something. Hanamaki found me eating lunch by myself outside and rather than poking fun, just sat next to me and ate as well. He didn't even ask why I was by myself, just sat and ate. When we were finished, and were just sitting there in silence, he said something that has always stuck with me. "Whatever you're thinking, whatever you're feeling, it's not what anyone else is thinking, so don't take yourself away from their thoughts, ok?" I just looked at him, dumbfounded. I had no idea this kid thought deeper than what he was going to do in the next five minutes. With that, he got up and walked by me, punching me in the shoulder as he went. "C'mon, we're gonna be late to class." He said without turning back around. I hopped up and caught up with him. I realized as we walked, I had no attraction to him whatsoever. I felt nothing in my pants! I laughed a little and he turned to look at me with a confused look on his face. "What's so funny?" he asked. "I had no idea you were so deep." I said, covering for myself. "Shut up. I have thoughts too." He said, annoyed. Things got a little better after that, but not when it came to Iwa. We were fine on the court, that is, until he would slap me on the back or something. Then I couldn't stop thinking about how badly I wanted him to touch me more. He had really big hands. I would get distracted in class staring at his hands. One day at practice he slapped me on the ass after a spectacular service ace in a scrimmage match and I almost went through the roof. Thankfully it was towards the end of the match and the rotation changed, so I was subbed out. After that, I sat on the bench with a towel across my lap, trying not to give any indication of the rod that was killing me between my legs. Around that time, some girl confessed to Iwa and they started dating. I remember him going on and on about how hot she was and how he couldn't wait to kiss her. I tried to pretend I was happy for him and say all the things, but they felt completely hollow. My chest ached hearing him talk about her and I felt like I was crumbling into pieces as we walked home that day. I plastered on a smile so he wouldn't see that I was actually about to cry the more he talked. After he went into his house, I walked home not seeing anything of what was around me. I walked in, walked to my room, shut the door and didn't even come out for dinner. I laid there all night, Iwa's words echoing in my head over and over. He wanted to kiss her. He couldn't wait to hold her hand. She was so hot. I hated her and I didn't even know her. I couldn't believe how something so stupid made my heart hurt so very much. I felt hollow, empty, like the glue that had been holding me together was being stripped away. I knew that I was attracted to him, but I hadn't realized until then that I loved him. I cried off and on all night until I was too exhausted to cry any more. After that, I did the only thing that made sense in the end and pushed everything I felt for him into a box in my mind and locked it away. It would take longer for my heart, but I just kept telling myself over and over that if I loved him, seeing him happy was enough for me, no matter who it was with. This was the only way that didn't cause me to want to die just being near him. That I got to be in his life at all I tried to convince myself was enough. I tried to hide how happy I was when they broke up after only a few weeks. I took him out for barbecue even though he was the one who dumped her. That fact alone made me happier than it should have and I felt like a terrible person all over again. He didn't seem that upset about breaking up with her, but he wasn't one to turn down barbecue. This became a pattern for him and I made sure to be there every time. Someone would confess to him, he'd start to date them, then it would fizzle after a week or two. Either she would get annoyed with him or he'd get tired of her and they'd break up. I actually asked him once if he was just doing this for the barbecue. "Maybe I am. Maybe I like having you buy me barbecue." He said with a mouthful of food. That jerk. "Next time you're paying for yourself!" I yelled at him across the grill. He just smiled, looking like a chipmunk with his mouth stuffed. Towards the end of the season, a girl approached me and confessed. To me. I didn't have any experience in this, and I didn't want anyone to suspect anything, so I accepted it and we decided to start dating. Iwa seemed like he was jealous that I was the one getting the attention for once and he started acting like a total ass. He'd ignore me, get pissed off at me for stupid things, call me Shittykawa more than usual. Finally, one day, I'd had it. I had asked him to pass me a ball to practice my jump serve and he just dropped it at my feet before walking by me up to the net. I glared daggers into the back of his head until an idea popped into my brain. Looking back, it could have been very dangerous, but he really pissed me off that day. I set up the serve, smashing it hard into the back of his skull, where I'd been glaring. He turned around with murder in his eyes. I smiled, "Oops. My bad." I said. His lip drew up into a sneer and I realized I'd never seen him that genuinely angry before. Coach yelled at me to pay more attention and we reset. He turned back around saying something about 'Ass-kawa' and I pushed down the urge to hit him again. After practice, he grabbed his stuff and started walking home without me. No matter how mad we'd been at each other before, we'd always walked home together. It was engrained in us from middle school. Our moms told us to always stick together to be safe and we'd never NOT walked home that way. I grabbed my stuff and took off after him. I caught up with him about a block away from school. "Iwa." I yelled after him. "Hey, Iwa!" I yelled again, thinking he might not have heard me, but he just kept on walking. "IWA-CHAN!!" I yelled again. Didn't even look back. "IWAIZUMI HAJIME STOP!" I yelled again and some old lady stared at me. I bowed my apologies and ran to catch up again. Now I was really, REALLY pissed. He was clearly ignoring me and I didn't know why. Just because I hit him with a serve? What the hell? I've hit him tons of times before and he's never ever been like this. What the fuck is his problem? The more I trailed after him, the angrier I got until I'd had enough of him ignoring me and I chucked my water bottle at him. It broke open, splattering him with what water was left. He finally stopped and turned around, furious, but so was I. "What the fuck is your problem? Just because I hit you with a serve you turn into a royal asshole? You fucking started it when you dropped that ball like you were too good to hand it to me." I screamed at him. With that, he lunged at me, swinging. We'd had our share of fights in the past, all boys do, but there was an anger behind him this time that I'd never seen before nor did I understand at all. It pissed me off all the more and we rolled around on that sidewalk pummeling each other as the streetlights came on. I caught his jaw with a right hook and as he started to fall to the side, he came back with a jab that caught me in the mouth because of the angle he was falling at. We both stood there, panting like dogs, mean mugging each other. I ran my tongue over where I could feel my lip had split as he spit out a mouthful of blood. Must have bit his tongue. "What the fuck is your problem?" I asked him after a minute. He looked at me like he wanted to say something, but in the end, he just shook his head, and picked up his bag. "Just stay away from me." He spat out over his shoulder as he walked off towards his house, leaving me standing alone in the street. I felt that empty feeling creep up into my chest again and my knees went weak. I dropped to a crouch, burying my face in my hands. I couldn't wrap my head around the thought that Iwa wouldn't be there any more, that he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. There's no way he could have found out, right? I didn't tell ANYONE. Why? What did I do? Why would he leave me behind? My anger evaporated and I felt everything in me shattering. I couldn't even remember how to just walk home. I don't even know how long I sat there, in the deepening dark, sobbing like an idiot. Once I'd run myself dry, reduced to tearlessly catching my breath in little, broken gulps, I finally stood back up. I'd never been so happy to live on a quiet street in my life; no one was out to see me crying like a newborn. I brushed myself off, breath still catching in my throat, picked up my bag, and began trudging towards home again. As I walked by his house, I looked up at his window, just out of habit. His light was off. I saw his bike was gone too. Guess he went off to meet some girl. Damn, why couldn't he just tell me what I did wrong? Any other time he's the FIRST to point out what I fucked up, why won't he just fucking tell me? I got so mad, I picked up a rock and threw it at his window. It wasn't big enough to break it and it didn't make me feel any better, but it felt right. I turned and continued walking home, unable to look anywhere but the tops of my sneakers. I had pushed so much down that when he told me to stay away from him, it was like someone ripped the top off a pressurized can and all the things I didn't want to feel came bursting out. They stabbed like a million little knives into my heart, my soul, my mind, screaming at me all the things I just watched walk away. In a matter of minutes, my best friend, the first person I loved, the whole reason I was who I was, disappeared. I felt empty again and didn't want to care anymore. I felt myself go numb and just let it happen. You can follow this fanfiction on Wattpad *Animeforwomen does not own story or drawing*