Post-UA, Aged Up MHA Story
"Dammit, Deku!" The words froze me in place. His voice was deeper, but it still held that tell-tale growl. He flew past me, blasting the piece of building that was hurtling towards the rescue crews in the street into dust. I just stared up at him as the pebbles rained over the scene and he came back down, landing a few yards from me. I couldn't believe I was looking at him again after all this time. His hair was cut short on the sides and his shoulders were even broader than they used to be, but other than that, he looked exactly the same.
The smirk on his face was even the same as he walked over to me. "I'm back in Japan for five minutes and I'm already saving your ass again. Dumbass Deku…ruining my vacation." He muttered the last part as he looked everywhere but at me. I just stared at him, slack jawed. Of all places, he shows up here, while I'm working. "What? Why are you just staring at me?" he growled and I snapped back to reality.
"Eight years. Eight years without a word and you just show up?" I blurted out. He looked at me for just a moment before looking away again. There was no making sense of the array of emotions that were welling up in me, but the one I felt most was rage and I needed to get it under control quick. I took a deep breath, exhaling slow. "Thank you for saving us. Now, excuse me. I have more work to do." I said as calmly as possible as I launched myself up to the roof of the adjacent building, leaving him and his stupid muscles standing there in the street.
As I helped the emergency crew shore up the collapsing wall, my thoughts were a million miles away, in a time I'd long tried to put behind me. The memories were crushing me with the weight of the emotions they brought with them. Maybe he'll leave before we get done here. He did say he was here on vacation, not work. With that thought, I threw myself into the work at hand, forcing myself to focus.
What felt like an eternity later, we'd secured the building and evacuated all the tenants. The Incident Commander gave the all clear and I finally ripped off my sweat-soaked hood. As I slowly walked back to crew truck, a headache began throbbing behind my eyes. I rubbed my forehead as I trudged, looking down at my dust covered boots. "You still getting headaches after a job?" The deep voice to my left caught me off-guard, but somewhere inside, I'd been expecting it.
I knew it was too much to hope that he'd just go on his way.With a heavy sigh, I looked over in the direction the voice came from to see Kacchan standing on the sidewalk, hands shoved in the pockets of his jeans. "Only when the job is a real pain in the ass, you know, like you." I replied, staring him dead in the eye. He held my eye for a minute, expressionless before he dropped his gaze to the ground and huffed out a little laughed through his nose.
"Good to see you haven't changed too much." He said, his tone softer. I really wanted to Detroit Smash that stupid face of his. I hated how good he looked. The tight black v-neck shirt hugged him perfectly in all the right places, the jeans doing the same. I couldn't help but stare at the stupid flames he had tattooed on each forearm, remembering when he got them done. It felt like a lifetime ago. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to will the throbbing pain in my head to chill for just a moment.
"What are you doing here, Kacchan?" I asked, hoping he'd get it over with and I could go home, take a shower and cry into a bottle of whiskey. "I kind of thought it'd be obvious, I mean, it's a building collapse, so of course-" "What are you doing in Japan?" I asked, cutting him off. He sighed, his shoulders sagging, like a huge weight sat on them. "I'm finally selling mom's place and I had to come back for the closing." He replied quietly.
I hadn't expected that answer. There was a time where I'd drive by that place at night, hoping to catch a glimpse of a light on, hoping that maybe he'd returned without telling me. After a while, I stopped going, knowing that I was wasting my time. "Well," I finally said, "Good luck." I turned to continue walking, but he caught my arm, stopping me. "I…um…" he stumbled.
"What? Did you really expect me to welcome you back with open arms after eight years of complete radio silence? You always were such an asshole." My rage spilled over as I spat out the words. He just stared at the ground, but didn't let go of my arm. "Go take care of whatever it is that you're here to do and leave me alone." I snapped at him, shaking my arm loose of his grip. "Deku-" he started, but stopped when I glared at him.
I wanted to call him every shitty name I could think of and curse him for days to come. Instead, all I could think of was how much I'd missed the touch of his hand. "You look good, but I guess you already know that. Goodbye, Katsuki." I said and saw his eyes go wide before walking away. As we rode back to base, I couldn't tell if the pain in my chest was from the fact that he didn't try to stop me a second time or that I actually had the balls to say goodbye.
I left the paperwork for the next day and went home without a word to anyone. As hard as I tried, I couldn't escape the lifetime of memories that contained him flooding every thought. Why couldn't he have just done his business and caught the next flight back to New York? I dried off from my shower, threw on some sweats, poured myself a hefty glass of whiskey and sank into the couch with a head full of Kacchan.
About halfway through my second glass, there was a knock at my door. I already knew who it was. He always has to have the last fucking word. Let's get this over with quickly. I opened the door, standing back to let him come in. We didn't need nosy neighbors giving hot tips to the local gossip column. I closed the door behind him and walked back over to the couch, ignoring him. He followed and sat on the chair across from me. We just sat there in awkward silence for an eternity before my buzzed brain had enough.
"Just say whatever it is you want to say and go already." I grumbled, taking another gulp. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "I didn't come here to upset you," he started, and I huffed out a laugh as I swirled the liquor in my glass. He was doing the thing with his voice where sounded all soft and made my heart beat twice as fast in my chest. Jerk. "I know I owe you an apology for how I left, but I-" "AN APOLOGY??" I yelled, interrupting him. I couldn't stand to look at him. I felt the tears welling up and I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of seeing me cry like the old Deku.
I stood up and walked over to the window, staring out at the skyline of Tokyo. "You ask me to marry you…and then you disappear. You fucking up and move across the globe without so much as a 'c-ya'." I said, the last words wavering as I tried to swallow back all the hurt they brought with them. I took a deep breath. "How about a why?" I said as I stared into my glass. I wanted to be strong and stare him down, but I didn't have it in me.
He was silent for a long time before I heard him get up and walk up behind me. I pleaded with myself to be strong and not turn around. "There is no why that could justify what I did. Dad died, and then mom so soon after. I was terrified that you were going to be next and…" he trailed off and went quiet again. "And what?" I asked, trying to sound annoyed and not desperate to finally hear his reason after so many years of silence.
"And I knew," his voice cracked. He cleared his throat and sighed. "I knew if that happened, I would die soon after because there's no way I could live without my heart." His voice broke at the end and I could hear him sniffling. Fuck. There was no holding back my own tears after that. "In some fucked up train of thought, I believed that if I made you hate me, I could protect you from the curse of the people I love getting hurt that seems to follow me everywhere and the only way you'd ever hate me, would be if I cut off everything between us." His voice was small, sad. I wanted to punch him and shake him and kiss him all at the same time.
We were both quiet for a long time, except for the occasional sniffle. "You know," I finally said, breaking the silence, "Once I found out where you went, I booked a ticket and ran to the airport, ready to fly across the world to beg you to come back. I got all the way to the gate before I thought of something and I think…I think that's when my heart actually broke." I leaned forward, pushing my head against the glass of the window and closing my eyes as the memory surged in my mind. "I thought, maybe you didn't want to be found…by me." I said softly.
He wrapped his arms around me from behind and squeezed me tightly. I felt his tears on my shoulder and I tried my hardest to keep it together. "I thought I was doing the best thing I could to protect you. There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't think about you, Deku. Not a single one." He strained to get the words out between the sobs. "Then why now? Why are you here now, after all this time?" I could hear the desperation in my voice as I spoke, the tears falling in a steady stream now.
"I thought I could come back, sign the papers and leave again without bothering you but, I couldn't make myself go without seeing you, just once. The one time I come back and I blow off my flight to drive 3 hours to Tokyo on the off chance I might catch a glimpse of you again. I'm so stupid." he said into my shoulder. I was dangerously close to breaking completely. I'd spent so long feeling hurt, then angry at him and now, he just shows up out of nowhere? I didn't know if I actually wanted to kill him or kiss him.
"Deku, I'm not asking you to forgive me, what I did was unforgivable. I don't even expect you to like me, I just needed to see you. I've never stopped loving you, not for a single day, but I understand if you did. I can never take back the pain I caused you, caused us, but please, don't ever doubt that I have always, always, loved you." His voice was so sad, and it made my heart ache. My will power snapped and I spun around and grabbed his cheeks. "You dumbass." I said before leaning in, kissing him deeply; my empty heart, full once more.
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